long live.

It's not a matter of falling out of love.
It's a matter of love changing.

My love for you changed.

In the months you've been away, I've grown so much. I've had experiences on my own that have changed me. I've hit rock bottom and I've been on cloud nine. I've laughed harder and cried harder than I ever have before. I've lived life and taken advantage of its teaching moments. I'm not the same person I was fifteen months ago. And, for the most part, I think that's a good thing. The people I've met, the experiences I've had, and the time I've had to myself to learn and grow have shown me the person I ought to be and the things I hope to get out of life.

Our relationship wound up in the whirlwind of everything that was changing. I didn't just change as a person; many of the relationships and circumstances in my life changed along with me. We happened to be one of those things.

I fought long and hard against anything and everything that posed a threat to my plans. I had a one-track mind and shut out any and all other possibilities. In a sense, I was rigging my own life. Out of fear, stubbornness, and how much I loved you... I couldn't bring myself to have an open-mind and let things happen. I was afraid to submit myself to the Lord's will because I had a phobia His will wouldn't involve the one thing I wanted most: YOU.

I ran. I hid. I fought the good fight.
But panting, out of breath, I knew the Lord wanted me to stop running.

Now I know why.

We're great together; but we're not the best. The Lord has greater things in store for both of us.

I didn't find someone who was better than you; I found someone who was better for me. Some who I am better for.

People have said, "This guy must be pretty special to make her think twice about Jeff Boyd." It's so true!
You are honestly one of the most amazing people I have ever known. And it's obvious I'm not the only one who thinks that.
You are so incredible and it took someone equally as incredible to catch and hold onto my attention.
I am far from deserving. I don't know how I got so lucky to have the two most amazing men on Earth in the palm of my hand... But I know I made up for my good luck by having to choose between you both. It was the absolute hardest thing I've ever done in my life and I hated every second of being caught in the middle.

There were a lot of things we did wrong in our relationship; things that are going to make a huge difference when we find someone to set it right.

My relationship with your family, the way we treated each other, and our future plans were just fine for young, restless, carefree teenagers; but I’m afraid those things are far too shaky to build a life together on.

It’s hard for me to tell you our plans have changed because I know how much we were both counting on them, but I wouldn’t spend the time or tears, on either of our parts, telling you this if I didn’t know it was right.

There’s someone out there that your family is going to love; someone who will meet their expectations and be everything they know you deserve.

There’s someone out there who’ll never leave you feeling jealous, disappointed, or doubtful.

There’s someone out there who will perfectly fill those empty shoes in all your future plans; someone with the same hopes, dreams, and goals and someone who’ll support you in yours.

I know this because you’re too great to settle.

We may not have been the grow-old-together kind, but we certainly stayed young together. You were my very best friend growing up. You made my high school experience everything it was. I always had so much fun with you. There's not a single memory of ours that I would trade for anything in the world. I will always cherish you, your friendship, and the time we spent together. It was priceless. It was perfect. You were my first love. You taught me how to love and what it's supposed to feel like. You opened the doors for me to love again.

I hope I have done the same for you.

You will always be one of my closest friends. I will never have anything but good feelings towards you. There is no reason for grudges, bad feelings, or ill-will. The only thing that went wrong between us was finding out that there's something better... and, down the road looking back, we'll be thankful. I know there is someone much better for you than me. If there's someone better for me, the Lord has someone better in mind for you, too.

I never fell out of love with you. I just grew up and learned to love you differently. I love you for the person you are and the person you made me. I love you for the memories you gave me and the lessons you taught me. I love you for the lifelong friendship that I know we'll always share.

Thanks for everything,
Wit